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Networking and soft skills. Social capital. Transfer of trust.
Why a network can’t be passed down by inheritance
What happens when a father tries to “hand over” people from his network to his son
Networking and soft skills. Family connections.
Connections are a form of capital you can inherit? Not quite…
“Call this person — I’ve worked with them for 20 years,” the father says, handing his son a phone number. And then… something unexpected happens (not really). The contact doesn’t work out.
Why?
A network is not a list in your phone. It’s trust, shared history, joint wins, and challenges you’ve been through together. It’s the smell of sweat after unloading a truck during a student job; or a story about a bottle of something strong when you were negotiating something important. It’s a handshake after a tough deal. Something that can’t be forwarded in a WhatsApp message.
Between the father and his contact, there is a bridge.
Between the son and that person — there’s a moat. And it’s not guaranteed anyone will cross it.
Especially if the new person has no time, no empathy, no curiosity, and no desire to build their own reputation — only a last name. That’s not enough.
Trust is not transferred automatically.
Even if you’ve been “recommended,” it doesn’t mean trust is transferred automatically. It has to be rebuilt: through listening, being useful, small actions, and respect for other people’s time.
A network isn’t transferable.
It is built from scratch. Every time. Even within one family. Even across generations.
And that’s actually good news. Because a real network is not about last names or connections — it’s about who you are, how well you listen, and how you can be useful. And that is already in your hands.
So what should you do, father?
What should a father do? Help build a bridge of their own. Introduce, but don’t impose. Give not a list of contacts, but context: who this person is, how they think, what matters to them. Share stories, show how the relationship was built. And give the son — or daughter — the space to earn respect on their own. Because you can pass on everything except trust.
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