Networking and Soft Skills: Business Communication to Build Trust.
How to speak confidently and calmly with ‘high-flyers’
Why does it become difficult to speak when you’re faced with an ‘important person’, and how can you change your attitude towards conversation? Let’s learn how to speak to those of higher status.
Why does it become difficult to speak when you’re faced with an ‘important person’?
Fear and status
You’d prepared yourself. You wanted to speak with confidence. Everything seemed to be in order. And then—just like that—instead of a conversation: a dry mouth, stammering sentences, and the thought, ‘I just want this to be over as soon as possible’.
When you’re talking to someone of higher status — be it a manager, an investor, an expert or simply an influential figure — you might experience a sort of mental block. And that’s normal. But it’s something you can work on.
Before we talk about the tools, let’s figure out exactly what’s getting in the way.
Six fears that hold us back
1. Страх оценки.
"А вдруг подумают, что я глупый?" — Эта мысль съедает уверенность. Особенно если собеседник умён, авторитетен или просто старше.
2. Страх отказа.
"А если он просто промолчит или скажет «неинтересно»?" — Боязнь быть проигнорированным мешает сделать первый шаг.
3. Страх выглядеть навязчиво.
"Не хочу казаться прилипалой или выскочкой." — Из-за этого ты стесняешься проявить инициативу.
4. Страх не попасть в тему.
"Что, если я начну говорить, а он вообще в другой реальности?" — Особенно актуально, если ты из другого круга, сферы или уровня принятия решений.
5. Страх "а вдруг спросят, а я не знаю?"
Типичный блок у перфекционистов. Хочется быть готовым на 150% — и в итоге не сказать ничего.
6. Страх, что будет неловко.
Этот страх в духе: «Ну вот, я подошёл, а он... уткнулся в телефон. Или сказал «извините» — и всё».
1. Fear of judgement.
‘What if they think I'm stupid?’ — This thought eats away at your confidence. Especially if the person you're talking to is intelligent, authoritative, or simply older.
2. Fear of rejection.
“What if they just stay silent or say ‘that’s not interesting’?” — The fear of being ignored stops you from taking the first step.
3. Fear of coming across as pushy.
“I don’t want to seem like a clingy person or a show-off.” — Because of this, you’re too shy to take the initiative.
4. Fear of missing the point.
“What if I start talking and they’re on a completely different wavelength?” — This is particularly relevant if you’re from a different circle, sphere or level of decision-making.
5. Fear of “what if they ask me something and I don’t know?”
A typical mental block for perfectionists. You want to be 150% prepared — and end up saying nothing at all.
6. Fear that it will be awkward.
This fear goes something like: “Right, I’ve gone over, and he’s… buried in his phone. Or he’s said ‘sorry’ — and that’s it.”
Just speak. Speak simply
All these ‘important people’ are just ordinary people. They feel awkward sometimes too, and they have days when they lack confidence. And believe me, if you can just be yourself—calm, polite and to the point—they’ll appreciate it.
That, in a nutshell, is what status is all about. The ability to be yourself.
P.S.
How to speak: