How to give and receive gifts in business so that relationships grow stronger

In Chinese culture, there is the concept of *guanxi*—a system of personal connections, obligations, and trust that is more important than formal contracts.

Guanxi is a long-term relationship in which people remember, reciprocate, and maintain balance, rather than cronyism (or, God forbid, just exchanging business cards like in “American networking”).

And one of the key tools of guanxi is gifts.

Not as an act of generosity.

But as a way to affirm:

“I see you,”

“Our relationship matters to me,”

“There is a shared history between us.”

In guanxi, what matters is not what you gave, but when, how, and in what context you gave it.

A mistake with a gift is not a trifle. It’s a signal of inattentiveness or disrespect.

Disrupt the balance—and you lose trust. Sometimes forever.

And here, China is not an exception, but simply an honest example.

Gifts as the language of relationships: how it worked in other cultures

In many societies, gifts were not an addition to relationships, but their foundation.

In Japan, a gift was a way to create a debt—not a financial one, but a moral one.

Accepting a gift meant: you acknowledge the relationship and are ready to balance it out someday.

Refusing a gift, or responding in a purely formal way, damaged the relationship more than an open conflict would.

В Средневековой Европе существовала целая «дипломатия даров».

Послы не приезжали с пустыми руками.

Мечи, ткани, редкие книги, экзотические животные — это были не сувениры, а инструменты политики.

Подарок демонстрировал статус, уважение и серьёзность намерений.

Неудачный дар = неуважение = закрытые двери.

In Scandinavian tribes, they gave rings and weapons.

A chieftain who didn’t give gifts lost his supporters.

Giving weapons or jewelry meant inclusion in a circle of loyalty.

From this comes the image of the “ring-giver” — a leader who holds an alliance together through gifts.

Among the Indigenous peoples of the Pacific Northwest of America, there is an entire gifting ceremony called the “potlatch.” In a potlatch, your status was defined not by how much you accumulated, but by how much you were able to give away. Gift-giving created hierarchy, alliances, and social order.

Are you wealthy? Show it with a gift to an important, needed (read: valued) neighbor.

In all these examples, a gift is a social contract, just without the paperwork.

Well, now to the present day. Why has the modern manager stopped giving gifts?

Because today we live in a world of contracts, compliance, and instant messages.

And so we hear more and more often:

— “He already has everything”
— “This might look strange”
— “Better nothing than the wrong thing”

As a result, relationships become… sterile and rushed.

Formally correct.

And amazingly fragile.

We send congratulations by message.

We call “on business.”

And we sincerely don’t understand why, in a difficult moment, there is no support.

So what can actually work now, at the end of 2025 and the beginning of 2026?

Note this: in an overloaded world full of digital noise, what has value are gift-artifacts.

Not expensive ones.

But those that leave a trace.

A book with a personal inscription.
An item tied to the story of a meeting or project.
A photo or document from your shared past.
Something you can’t “order in one click.”

Such gifts work as guanxi anchors.

They keep relationships alive, even when you haven’t talked for a long time.

Without turning this into yet another “task”:

— Make a list of 5–10 people where what matters is not deals, but the relationship.

— Think in advance about meaningful dates and transitions.

— Give not “what’s customary,” but what says: I remember the context.

— Don’t be afraid to look old-fashioned — guanxi is older than any CRM.

Give gifts! This will help lay the foundation of trust for years.

And let’s skip this “let’s do it after the holidays” of ours. Otherwise, what kind of holidays are they… with no gifts? 🍀

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There we will calmly go through your current situation, key challenges, and figure out how to move forward in the New Year.